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Author Topic: Musician Jokes  (Read 16697 times)

Offline David Tomkins

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Musician Jokes
« on: September 27, 2005, 11:28:37 AM »
Did you hear about the time our bassist locked hs car keys in his car?  we had to break the window to let him out......[:D]

right, who's next?
2005 Green Quilted Maple Custom Mojo signed by Steve Vai, 2006 Parker Fly T-Shirt, 2006 Parker Fly Baseball Cap.  A triple-whammy of Parker goodness!!

Musician Jokes

Offline Roland

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2005, 11:35:15 AM »
What does a drummer use for a contraceptive?

His personality

Roland
Roland
Read about 2008 India   http://mrspoppadum.blogspot.com/

Musician Jokes

Offline JPage

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2005, 12:53:39 PM »
How can you tell the stage is level?

The drummer drools from both sides of his mouth.

JP
 

Musician Jokes

Offline loumt123

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« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2005, 02:01:53 PM »
lol that was a good one
 

Musician Jokes

Offline bno

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« Reply #4 on: September 27, 2005, 02:50:37 PM »
Why Alex always smiling?

He can't seem to stop playing with his Fly...

ba dump bump.

'94 Fly Deluxe
Listen first, then play.

Musician Jokes

Offline corksailor

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« Reply #5 on: September 27, 2005, 03:47:35 PM »
Guitar is the only thing that gets better if you keep picking at it....



Corksailor
P-38
Fender Ultimate Chorus
Little Peavey
Seagull Acoustic
Yamaha 12 string
Corksailor
P-38 /Roland Acoustic
Fender Ultimate Chorus
Peavey Audition practice
Seagull/Alvarez/Yamaha12
Acoustics
Yamaha Magicstomp

Musician Jokes

Offline Bigbore

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #6 on: September 27, 2005, 07:06:27 PM »
"Mother, I want to grow up and be a rock-n-roll musician."
"Now son, you have to pick one or the other. You can't do both."
 

Musician Jokes

Offline David Tomkins

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #7 on: September 28, 2005, 01:59:21 AM »
that's the winner so far!!

how do you know when there is a drummer outside your door?  
The knocking speeds up and he doesn't know when to come in.....
« Last Edit: September 28, 2005, 02:00:24 AM by David Tomkins »
2005 Green Quilted Maple Custom Mojo signed by Steve Vai, 2006 Parker Fly T-Shirt, 2006 Parker Fly Baseball Cap.  A triple-whammy of Parker goodness!!

Musician Jokes

Offline David Tomkins

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2005, 02:05:36 AM »
How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
none - the keyboard player can do it
2005 Green Quilted Maple Custom Mojo signed by Steve Vai, 2006 Parker Fly T-Shirt, 2006 Parker Fly Baseball Cap.  A triple-whammy of Parker goodness!!

Musician Jokes

Offline JPage

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #9 on: September 28, 2005, 09:19:45 AM »
How many guitar players does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two.  One to turn the bulb and the other to watch the world revolve around him.
 

Musician Jokes

Offline NathanO

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« Reply #10 on: September 28, 2005, 10:13:22 AM »
How do you know when a drummer is at you door?

The nock slows down.

Regards,

Nathan

Musician Jokes

Offline bostjan

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #11 on: September 29, 2005, 04:38:32 PM »
why do drummers join bands?

they like to hang out with musicians. [;)]
 

Musician Jokes

Offline DrJeff

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #12 on: October 07, 2005, 11:05:57 AM »
One of my favorites...
What's the difference between a burning house and a burning banjo player?
   (They usually try to put the house fire out)

Saw that one coming, didn't you?



Rgds,
Jeff
Rgds,
Jeff

Musician Jokes

Offline David Tomkins

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #13 on: October 12, 2005, 11:28:47 AM »
how do you get a guitarist to slow down?
put some manuscript in front of him
2005 Green Quilted Maple Custom Mojo signed by Steve Vai, 2006 Parker Fly T-Shirt, 2006 Parker Fly Baseball Cap.  A triple-whammy of Parker goodness!!

Musician Jokes

Offline David Tomkins

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Musician Jokes
« Reply #14 on: October 12, 2005, 11:44:46 AM »
what's the difference between a bass guitar and a trampoline?
you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline[:D]

How many guitar players does it take to cover a Hendrix tune?
Evidently all of them......[:)]

How do you stop a drummer from drowning?
Shoot him before he hits the water[;)]

What is the difference between a bassist and a computer?
You only have to punch information into a computer once[B)]
2005 Green Quilted Maple Custom Mojo signed by Steve Vai, 2006 Parker Fly T-Shirt, 2006 Parker Fly Baseball Cap.  A triple-whammy of Parker goodness!!